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BY BRIANA CRAIG
This is my confession: In 2013, I allowed myself to be enslaved to the urgent. I sold myself down the river of productivity and missed out on a lot of good stuff in order to appease the pressing. I traded important connections and priceless moments to scratch tasks off a list. In 2014, I am reconstructing my to-do list.
I am grateful for the refining fires of 2013, especially the one finally burning this lesson into my head. Over the course of eight years, this problem of “productivity” and perfectionism has been steadily building. In an attempt to stay as far away as possible from the gal of my twenties, I made more lists, got more organized, became more productive, and bought into perfectionism—hook, line, and SINK HER.
My to-do list ruled my life. What started out as an innocent attempt at being organized, morphed into something rather chaotic. I recently completed my first year of nursing on a fast-paced cardiac unit. I allowed the very career I am so blessed with to further exacerbate my compulsion to respond to every matter with urgency.
I love caring for my patients and some days still can’t believe the blessing of being entrusted with such tremendous responsibility.
Nevertheless, medications must be administered on time, call lights are literally on a timer, heart rhythms must be analyzed, monitored, and reported with absolute accuracy, when a physician phones back we have 30 seconds to pick up before we can expect a dial tone, and we are charged with being the patient’s last point of safety. Every order must be scrutinized while we ask ourselves, is this safe and is it appropriate for this patient? In the end, we are responsible for every medication administered and must ensure every intervention, every necessary lab test, and every procedure is
completed. A common adage on the floor is “Prioritize. What crisis could mean someone’s life? Tend to that one first.” And they’re only half-kidding. In all of this, it’s imperative to make the time to hold a hand, listen, teach, answer questions, and offer empathy. I was carrying the constant sense of urgency from work into my everyday life.
I knew I reached a new low when I turned down date night after not seeing my husband all week, because my to-do list was too long. Not only did I pass up a fun time promising renewal, I missed out on connection with my husband. Even worse, I more than likely made him feel unimportant in my
life. At least, less important than my task list. Realizing this broke my heart.
Something needed to change. I was constantly stressed, forever rushed, and anxiety levels crept to an all-time high. Interestingly, my efficiency was at an all-time low, my wheels spinning faster than ever. I began to resent everything and anything requesting “my” time, even the things I once thoroughly enjoyed. I judged myself harshly if the list went unfinished. I was physically and emotionally exhausted all the time. And then it dawned on me—doing too much is as dangerous as doing too little.
To be completely honest, I must admit pride caused me to attempt too much and fear generated the endless lists. Charles E. Hummel discusses the Tyranny of the urgent in a small but powerful book with the same title. It will take discipline to not react to every matter in life as if it were urgent. I also understand this endeavor will require abundant grace. Webster defines this kind of grace as “A temporary exemption; a disposition to or an act of kindness, courtesy, or clemency; approval, mercy, pardon, favor.” Amazing grace, indeed.
How will I reject the tyranny of the to-do list in 2014? The practice of extending grace to others and self will be top priority. I will ask myself often, “What will happen if I do not get to this right now or even today?” I will review frequently the difference between urgent and important. Paying the electric bill on time is urgent, while connecting with family is important. The dishes in the sink are neither urgent nor important. I
will recognize time is not mine, but a gift. Therefore, I will not become frustrated if my urgent task is interrupted by something important.
The daily to-do list will no longer exist, but a weekly list will take its place, allowing for flexibility. In 2014, any to-do list I make will serve me, I will not serve it. The most important list will hang for an entire year on my refrigerator. To Do: Pray, laugh with your husband, call your
family, see your girlfriends, encourage someone, do justice, love mercy, walk humbly with your God.
Copyrighted image used under license from Shutterstock.com
