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How to be Single on Valentine’s Day

This one goes out to all of my girlies who will not have a Valentine this year. Valentine’s Day is approaching quickly and for the first time in a long time, I won’t have a Valentine. But guess what? I kind of love it!

How to be single this Valentine’s day:

I remember when I was in high school (and even parts of last year) thinking that a guy would bring me happiness. But over the past year, I’ve really come to realize that I want to be happy with myself and love myself before I love anyone else (ugh, cliché I know). AND in the wise, wise words of Judge Theisen, “This is your time to be selfish. If someone doesn’t fit into your plan, they are not the one.” It would have saved me a lot of time and tears if I would have listened to my daddio years ago. (Somehow dads actually seem to know a thing or two about teenage boys. Isn’t that funny?) Anyway, Judge Jon is correct! Your teenage years are a time for you to figure out who you are, what your goals are, and how you can achieve them. If someone with whom you are in a relationship does not seem to be fitting into your plan maybe it is time to let go.

Now, I know that letting someone go–especially letting go of someone who means a lot to you–is hard. But trying to force something to work is a waste of time and energy. For me, I think I kept trying to force my relationship because I felt like I had invested so much time, energy and what I thought was love into it. I wanted to have something to show for it. The fact of the matter was that I did get something out of it– especially after the relationship ended. I realized that although it was not a healthy relationship, I was able to see what I do want in a partner. I was able to see that I deserve to be treated with respect. I was also able to get closer with a lot of my friends who I abandoned when I was constantly with this guy. Most importantly, I was able to love myself again. In this relationship, I thought I was the reason it was not working, and I began to hate myself for it. I thought about ways I could change myself to make him want to be with me again. In reality, we were two young kids who just were not meant to be in a relationship. Once we were apart, I was able to see everything with a clear perspective.

It is also important that once you do say goodbye, to really mean it. Do not go texting him late at night when you are out with your friends (Been there, done that. It is not cute). Live your life! Have fun being you! Guess what? That new person will come. You will be happy that you had these hard times to show you how good this new person is.

So, this Valentine’s Day I will be happily single. I will buy myself some chocolate and have a girls’ night with my friends. I will enjoy my time being young and single, (maybe even a bit selfish) because it is just a chapter in my life, and it is important to enjoy life as it happens.

Happy Valentine’s Day to all!

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